LiFe oF gUohU|...cHp 36

hi o... juz wanna share this joke here... tt all for the post todae... nth much happen todae... was the same old sku life... gr8...

Red Riding Hood (Politically Correct Version)

There once was a young person named Red Riding Hood who lived with her mother on the edge of a large wood.

One day, her mother asked her to take a basket of fresh fruit and mineral water to her grandmother's house, not because this was woman's work, mind you, but because the deed was generous and helped engender a feeling of community. Furthermore, her grandmother was not sick, but rather was in full physical and mental health as was fully capable of taking care of herself as a mature adult.

So Red Riding Hood set off with her basket of food through the woods. Many people she knew believed that the forest was a forbidding and dangerous place and never set foot in it. Red Riding Hood, however, was so confident in her own budding sexuality that such obvious Freudian imagery did not hinder her. On her way to Grandma's house, Red Riding Hood was accosted by a Wolf, who asked her what was in her basket. She replied, "Some healthful snacks for my grandmother, who is certainly capable of taking care of herself as a mature adult."

The Wolf said, "You know, my dear, it isn't safe for a little girl to walk through these woods alone."

Red Riding Hood said, "I find your sexist remark offensive in the extreme, but I will ignore it because of your traditional status as an outcast from society, the stress of which has caused you to develop your own, entirely valid world view. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must be on my way."

Red Riding Hood walked on along the main path. But, because his status outside society had freed him from slavish adherence to linear, Western-style thought, the Wolf knew of a quicker route to Grandma's house. He burst into the house, and ate Grandma, an entirely valid course of action for a carnivore such as himself. Then, unhampered by rigid, traditionalist notions of what was masculine or feminine, he put on Grandma's nightclothes and crawled into bed..

Red Riding Hood entered the cottage and said, "Grandma, I have brought you some fat-free, sodium-free snacks to salute you in your role of a wise and nurturing matriarch."

From the bed, the Wolf said softly, "Come closer, child, so that I might see you."

Red Riding Hood said, "Oh, I forgot you are as optically challenged as a bat. Grandma, what big eyes you have!"

"They have seen much, and forgiven much, my dear."

"Grandma, what a big nose you have, only relatively, of course, and certainly attractive in its own way."

"It has smelled much and forgiven much, my dear."

"Grandma, what big teeth you have!" The Wolf said, "I am happy with who I am and what I am," and leaped out of bed. He grabbed Red Riding Hood in his claws, intent on devouring her.

Red Riding Hood screamed, not out of alarm at the Wolf's apparent tendency toward cross-dressing, but because of his willful invasion of her personal space.

Her screams were heard by a passing wood chopper-person (or log-fuel technician, as he preferred to be called). When he burst into the cottage, he saw the melee and tried to intervene. But as he raised his ax, Red Riding Hood and the Wolf both stopped.

"And, what do you think you're doing?" asked Red Riding Hood.

The wood chopper-person blinked and tried to answer, but no words came to him.

"Busting in here like a Neanderthal, trusting your weapon to do your thinking for you!," she said. "Sexist! Speciesist! How dare you assume that women and wolves can't solve their own problems without a man's help!"

When she heard Red Riding Hood's speech, Grandma jumped out of the Wolf's mouth, took the wood chopper-person's ax, and cut his head off. After this ordeal, Red Riding Hood, Grandma, and the Wolf felt a certain commonality of purpose. They decided to set up an alternative household based on mutual respect and cooperation, and they lived together in the woods happily ever after.

The end

guohuilist turned back time on Tuesday, July 13, 2004.

LiFe oF gUohU|...cHp 35

hi o... me back again... well... time flies... lesson have formally started for me over at Singapore Poly... hmm... missed studying...lolz... aniwae, i'm glad to be back to my studies... at least for now.. coz i dun wanna find myself regrettin wad i sae now in a few mths time... at least the study system now is nt stress... but the lessons per dae kinda stretched up for the whole dae... m we have nt tt much lessons per dae... only abt 3 or 4 lessons at most.. but each period last for an hr or 2 la... n the lunch break is at least an hr long... lolz... well... so i sorta gotta find source of entertainment for myself... n one bad pt abt poly life for me is tt the things i nid to buy are kinda expensive... gotta buy a tool set tt includes a mulitmeter, soldering thingy and sorta things for practical sessions...it all cost abt 130 bucks plus... n txtbks tt cost 38bucks... i'm feeling the emptiness in my bank account liao... nt to mention tt transport expenses...lol... but i kinda lyk poly life...at least for now... for once, i m learning things tt'll come into direct application to our lives... cool... for once, i m appreciating the wonders of studies... haha... hmmm for now, i m stuck with npcc again in poly.. joined sp npcc... damn.. m i gonna be stuck with npcc for me life? but i tink i gotta lyk it... i would luv to join a more sport-based cca... but dun seem to find time for it... coz of commitment to np... well, we'll c... till then, itz gonna be life saving and npcc for me... oh ya... 4got to mention tt for once, i actually miss girls in my life in class... for an engineering course tt i m in, i've got 17 guys and 3 girls in my class... kinda miss my old daes in cchs... of 1justice, 2harmony and 3/4loyalty when the ratio of ladies to guys are almost 3:1... but tt is back den... now... haiz... have tt kinda weird feeling now in class...lolz... yeah.. n i'm terribly sorry tt i din really appreciate ur presense in class my dear ex classmates.. i promised to appreciate u all now k?... lol... n, one thingy abt poly life is tt i'm almost spending my days in SAC... at EEE club where i play carrom, RISK, monopoly everydae...lol... interestin huh? lol...

to end it off with todae, gotta share this thingy up here( found tt when i'm surfin the jk of the dae at netscape site...... tt i find kinda amusing...
here goes...

Stupid Things Said In the World of Soccer:

1. Well, it's Liverpool two, Ipswich nil, and if the score stays this way, I've got to fancy Liverpool for the win.

2. He had an eternity to play that ball, but took too long.

3. And so they have not been able to improve on their 100% record.

4. With the last kick of the game, he scored with a header.

5. Well, it's a fabulous kaleidescope of colour: almost all the Brazilians are wearing yellow shirts.

6. If that had gone on, it would definitely have been a goal.

7. Their manager, Howard Wilkinson, isn't here today, which strongly suggests that he may be elsewhere.

8. I am a firm believer that if one team scores a goal, the other need to score two to win.

9. If a team scores early on, it often takes an early lead.

10. You cannot possibly have counted the number of passes made, but there were eight.

guohuilist turned back time on Sunday, July 11, 2004.

LiFe oF gUohU|...cHp 34

hi o... me here again... hmmm... juz read a wonderful story... so decided to post it up.... enjoy...

Tree
The reason I'm called tree is because I'm good at painting trees. Overtime I start to use a tree on the right hand corner as a trademark for all my watercolors painting.
I have dated 5 gals when I was in Pre-U.There's one gal who I love a lot but never dare go after her. She doesn't have a pretty face, doesn't have a good figure, and doesn't have outstanding charm. She is just a very ordinary gal.
I like her. I really like her. Like her innocent, like her frankness. Like her cuteness, like her intelligence and her fragility.Reason for not going after her is because I felt somebody so ordinary like her is not a good match for me. I'm also afraid that after we are together all the good feelings will vanish. I'm also afraid other's gossips will hurt her.I felt that if she's my gal, she will be mine ultimately and I don't have to give up everything just for her.
The last reason, made her accompany me for 3 years.
She watches me chase after gals, and I have made her heart cry for 3 years. She wants to be a good actress and I'm a very demanding director.
When I kissed my 2nd girlfriend, she bumped into us. She was embarrassed but smile and say "Go on!" before running off.
The next day, her eyes were swollen like a walnut. I purposely didn't want to think about what causes her to cry but laugh at her the whole day.
When everybody go back home, she was alone crying in the classroom. She didn't know that I returned from soccer training to get something. I watch her cry for an hour or so.
My 4th girlfriend didn't like her. There was once when both of them quarreled. I know that based on her character she's not the type that will start off the quarrel. But I still sided with my girlfriend.I shouted at her and her eyes were filled shocked. I didn't care about her feelings and walked off with my girlfriend.The next day, she still laughs and joke with me like nothing has ever happened. I know that she's very hurt but she didn't know that my heart ache is as bad as hers.
When I broke up with my 5th girlfriend, I asked her out. After going out for a day, I told her that I have something to tell her. She told me that coincidentally, she has something to tell me too. I told her about my break up and she told me about her getting together.I know who the guy is. He has been going after her for quite a while. A very cute guy, full of energy, lively and interesting. His pursuit for her has been the talk of the school. I can't show her my heart ache but could only smile and congratulate her.
When I reach home, the heart ache is so strong that I can't stand it. It's like a heavy weighted stone on my chest. I couldn't breath. Wanted to shout but can't. Tears rolled down and I broke down and cry. How many times have I seen her cry for the man that doesn't acknowledge her presence too?
During graduation, I read a sms in my hp. It was send 10 days ago when I broke down and cry. I haven't read it since then.
It says "Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay?"

Leaf
During Pre-U days, I like to collect leaves. Why?Because I felt that for a leaf to leave the tree she has been relying on for so long it takes a lot of courage.
During the 3 years of Pre-U, I was on very close terms with a guy. Not BGR kind but as buddy kind.But when he had his 1st girlfriend, I learnt a feeling I never should have learnt -Jealousy. The sourness in the heart can't be described by using a lemon. It's like 100 rotten sour lemons. Sourness to the extreme limit.They were only together for 2 months. When they broke up, I hide my strong sense of happiness. But after a month, he got together with another gal.I like him and I know he like me. But why won't he pursue me? Since he loves me why he doesn't want to make the first move? Whenever he had a new girlfriend, my heart would hurt.Time after time, my heart was hurt. I begin to suspect that this is a one sided love. If he doesn't like me, why does he treat me so well? It's beyond what you will normally do for a friend.
Liking a person is very heart wrenching. I can know his likes, his habits. But his feelings towards me I can never figure out. You can't expect me a gal to ask him right?Despite that, I still want to be by his side. Care for him, accompany him, and love him. Hoping that one fine day, he will come and love me.It's like waiting for his phone call every night, wanting him to send me sms. I know that no matter how busy he is, he will make time for me. Because of this, I waited for him.The 3 years were the hardest to go through and I really want to give up. Sometimes, I wonder should I continue waiting.
The pain and hurt, the dilemma accompanies me for 3 years. Till the end of my 3rd year, a 2nd year junior begins to go after me. Everyday he pursuit me relentlessly.From outright rejection to a point in time when I felt that I'm willing to let him have a small footing in my heart. He's like a warm and gentle wind, trying to blow a leaf away from the tree.
In the end, I realized that I didn't want to give this wind a small footing in my heart.I know this wind will bring this badly battered leave far away and better land. Finally I left tree, but the tree only smile and didn't ask me to stay.
Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay?

Wind
Because I like a gal called leaf. Because she's so dependent on tree so I have to be a gust wind. A wind that will blow her away.
When I first met her, it was 1 month after I transfer to the new school. I saw a petite person looking at my seniors and me playing soccer.
During ECA time, she will always be sitting there. Be it alone or with her friends looking at him. When he talks with gals there's jealousy in her eyes. When he looked at her, there's a smile in her eyes.
Looking at her became my habit. Just like she likes to look at him.
One day, she didn't appear. I felt something is wrong. I can't explain the feeling except it's a kind of uneasiness. The senior was also not there as well.
I went to their classroom, hid outside and saw my senior scolding her. Tears were in her eyes while he left.
The next day, I saw her at her usual place, looking at him. I walked over and smiled to her. Took out a note and gave to her. She was surprised.
She looked at me, smiled and accepts the note. The next day, she appeared and passes me a note and left.
"Leaf's heart is too heavy and wind couldn't blow her away."
"It's not that leaf heart is too heavy. It's because leaf never want to leave tree." I replied her note with this statement and slowly she started to talk to me and accept my presents and phone calls.
I know that the person she loves is not me. But I have this perseverance that one day I will make her like me. Within 4 months, I have declared my love for her no less than 20 times.
Every time, she will divert away from the topic. But I never give up. If I decide I want her to be mine, I will definitely use all means to win her over.
I can't remember how many times I have declared my love to her. Although I know she will try to divert but I still bear a small ray of hope. Hoping that she will agree to be my girlfriend. I didn't hear any reply from her over the phone.
I asked "What are you doing? How come you didn't want to reply?" She said, "I'm nodding my head."
"Ah?" I couldn't believe my ears. "I'm nodding my head" She replied loudly.
I hang up the phone, quickly changed and took a taxi and rush to her place and press her door bell. During the moment when she opens the door, I hugged her tightly.
Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay?

guohuilist turned back time on Thursday, July 08, 2004.

LiFe oF gUohU|...cHp 33

todae's post will be on wad happen todae k? duhz... well... me went to sentosa todae... initially was only me, zong rong, jasper and zhen qiang... den suddenly, i find more company todae... but obviously the more the merrier lar... hmm... it all started juz becoz zq asked wanna suntan todae on the nite b4... den todae juz go le... haha... tink we r juz lyk this, no worries... hmm... todae... supposed to meet at harbour front at 11am... den... me and zr meet first den go together.. at first i tot we'll be late... den go dere only ziyan was dere... esther and sookmei is next to arrive with jasper... den is mich.... at 1130am... zq juz woke up...so we went off w/o him... so we went off to the bus station or wadeva u called it... at this pt of time, coz the girls co. haven lunched yet.. so we called them to pack takeaway... den me, zr and jasper went off to finish a plate of chicken rice, a soup and 3 bowls of rice in 5mins... by then... they oso haven ordered...haha... den they blamed me for being selfish... call them to ta bao... den we eat dere...haha... we went o palawan beach after getting ard sentosa at 1pm plus...coz we got lost...haha... the guyz co. played beach soccer with no rules followed by a beach volley ball game... den it started to rain.. den suddenly we realised tt dere is a couple of guyz who got their volleyball stuck on a tree... being helpful, we decided to help them..haha...


rain stopped... we went over to tony's class gathering place... had a versus game with them which we won... next... had a sandcastle building comp. which we won oso...coz ziyan brought along some tools...haha...den me ,jasper, tony and zr went into the water to have a sandfight and somersault stunts- showing... haha... lame...den we went to the yellow thingy at the 3m deep pt to suntan... zr, esther, sookmei, mich joined us later... met 2 whacky foreigner... 2 guyz to be precise... duno how and y, we started to have a wrestling match with them... haha...losers into the water... lame... den they left us and we all suntan dere till 5pm plus... went to bathe after tt... had chicken rice again at harbourfront food court... den went to parkway to play pool and lan... den now home liao... damn... i seemed to write sentence tt dun make linkage or sense here todae... so pardon me readers( if any)...

school starts later at 10am... damn... no youth dae... sian 0.5

guohuilist turned back time on Monday, July 05, 2004.